Recently, my amazing MOH has started doing some research for my shower. As all good planners do, she asked for a rough estimate of the guest list. I went to my mother and she and I compiled a list of people, all of whom have known me most of my life, are close friends, or relatives. Then, I asked my MIL for her guest list, which is where my etiquette conundrum began.
On the list she gave me, of the 40 people she wanted to invite, I had only ever met (and remembered meeting) 13 of them. Violet Dude informed me of a few relatives that were on the list that I met at a family reunion once, but I couldn’t pick them out in a line up if I tried.
I’m planning on calling my MIL and having the discussion with her about reducing her guest list. This is my reasoning:
1. The bridal shower should be people that know me, that I’ve met and that I don’t have to be reintroduced to at my own bridal shower.
2. It’s kind of rude to invite people, who haven’t met me before, especially because the shower is a gift giving occasion. I’d feel really uncomfortable receiving a gift from someone I’ve only met once or that I’ve never met.
3. Her guest list is almost as large as my mom’s and mine combined. (We both have around 22, so it’s 44 combined) I have a problem with this, since it is MY shower and Violet Dude won’t be there.
4. I think having 80 some guests is a little overwhelming for a shower. I know some of you are planning weddings that aren’t even that big! But, I don’t want to have two showers because finding time for us to have one is going to be stressful enough.
5. The day should be about me, my friends and my family. I have become close to Violet Dude’s family as well, and I’d like to invite the ones I have become close to, but I’m relatively sure that his second cousin probably doesn’t want to come to my shower any more than I want her to be there. The wedding is a different story completely.
So, Garden, what do you think? Am I being a bridezilla? Should I just give in and let her invite all 40? Or, does etiquette dictate that I’m making the right choice?
Showers usually bring little Dandelions (the dude calls them weeds) in our backyard, but this past month the Showers brought us lots of gifts from friends and family. My showers are done. The dude and I have one more little family thing to attend over Memorial Day weekend in Indiana (called the Indy 500–more on that another time), and then we have only two weeks until the wedding! While in Indiana my cousin Nicole is going to host a Couples Brunch in honor of us. I know it will be a blast, because she has this amazing home and she loves to entertain!
My lovely sister finished my shower invites and we have sent them out. The colors are a little off, but you get the idea. We decided on a Hawaii theme, since we’re headed there for our Honeymoon.
Everyone says that as soon as your first shower hits, time flies by til wedding day. All of my shower invitations have arrived and I say, “let the showers begin!!” I thought I would share them with you.
Is anyone else having multiple showers because of family or friends in another city or state?
Our (my) shower was this past weekend. All in all, great success!
Not entirely sure about this pic. The weird one-eyed gaze is a little creepy.
I was astonished by everyone’s generosity given the current state of the economy. And, all the people who really matter in my life were able to make it (minus Pansy Dude’s step-mother and step-sister, who are also very important but live in California, and understandably wouldn’t be able to make it).
My Maid of Honor Jennifer called me the other day to talk about my California Bridal Shower. It was really great hearing that she had been reading my blog to get a better idea of the wedding through what I had been writing!
She knew my rules about the shower. No cheesey games, no major color scheme, make it short (about 2 hours), and I don’t want to be the center of attention (even though that is going to be hard to do since I’m the bride). Knowing all that, she really did a great job in taking those things into consideration.
I may have mentioned before that I am a DIY novice. Basically, if a project requires a lot of manual dexterity, artistic ability or complicated steps, it’s probably not for me. I may have the ability to visualize what I want to do but my hands rarely cooperate! With that said, I decided that decorating gift bags for a Valentine’s Day wedding shower would be a good project for me.
Taken by me!
My shower invitations went out this morning. Oh yeah! Shower me with goodies in exactly 1 month!
How do I know my shower invitations went out this morning? Because I put them in the mail myself. That’s right- gasp all you want. I made my shower invitations. I know, I know… my shower is not in my control. (That’s what you all think!) Why did I do it? Well, first and foremost because I take great joy in designing and crafting, I also did it because my maid of honor is still a student while she works full time and my mother (the two women hosting my shower) is crafting-functionaly-retarded. If left to their own devices I would end up with some doilies glue sticked to napkins with lots of glitter, scanned and then printed on 8 1/2 x 11 sheets. I adore them both, do I want to stress them out by forcing them to do things neither of them are comfortable with? Usually, yes. This time, no.