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Help!! I am worried I am turning into that bride!! Here’s the situation: I have been convo-ing a certain etsy seller for the past couple of weeks in regards to some custom attire pieces for our wedding party (I don’t want to throw this seller under the bus, as I am assuming it will all work out in the end), and she has been very good… timely responses, thorough answers to my questions, etc. etc. I have purchased from her in the past (non-wedding related), and have had no complaints… great product, quick shipping, overall I’ve been satisfied.

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Today I was reading a popular wedding blog and came across a post where a bride was recounting a Category 5 meltdown she had after the groom accidentally glimpsed her dress hanging in their hotel room. I’m talking screaming, tears, the whole works. And I just thought, really? Of all the things to get worked up about, this is what sends you into apoplexy? I was surprised to read dozens of supportive comments from other brides.

Photo from manolobrides.com

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Every morning on the way to my gym I listen to my favorite radio morning show. The Morning X with Dave and Chuck-the-Freak on 89X. (You should stream it in… they are hilarious!) Recently, they’ve been running The Best of the Morning X, because everyone has been on vacation. They re-ran a segment that I recall hearing a nearly a year ago, which stunned and angered me just as much the second time around.

I forget the pretenses under which the topic came about but the key idea was that there are brides who make their bridal party sign contracts to remain in the wedding.

Image from abajournal.com

Something to the effect of:

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The impossible happened last night…I broke down. I think it is important to share this with all you buds because I have always heard about brides breaking down in the planning process, but I was sure this would never happen to me. Luckily, I think it was on a reasonable scale and Cotton Dude was amazing.

flicker.com

What led up to my breakdown was the planning of everyone’s travel plans, final head count questions, vendors who won’t get back to me, and budgeting. I have my wedding pretty well planned, but my invitations were just sent out a couple of weeks ago. Side note: for a destination wedding, it is important to send out the invitations in plenty of time for your guests to book their travel plans. This has opened a flood gate of questions and nervous travelers from the States.

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I’m not the type of person to take random quizzes to figure out things like “What’s your bridal style?” or “What kind of groom is he?” but I found myself taking the “Are you a Bridezilla?” quiz on TheKnot. Here are my results:

Yup, you’re a Bridezilla!

How can we put this gently: Somewhere along the way from “Yes!” to “I do,” you’ve lost your subtle sensitivity. Your admirable ambition to create the best possible celebration for friends and family has turned into somewhat of a crusade, and those around you are suffering. It’s time to relax a bit and probably take a little break from the planning. Go for dinner or drinks with your guy and your gal pals, and don’t talk about the wedding – not even once. Because remember, once you’re married, these people will return to being your family and friends — not members of your wedding party. Cut people a little slack.

Amazing, I never thought I would be a Bridezilla, but I can see how others might think so based on some of my answers to the questions… I am a hands-on, detail oriented bride and I want my wedding to be as near to perfect as humanly possible, but I also can’t walk all over others to make that happen…

To avoid being a Bridezilla, I propose the following tips (that I will start working on this instant!):

1. Practice healthy habits and reduce stress. Eat a sensible and balanced diet, get regular exercise, get your beauty sleep, and chill out. Massages are a great way to reduce stress and pamper yourself!

2. Plan wedding-free time–be it an hour, a day, weekend, or week–where you do not talk about the wedding at all. If you slip up and start in on wedding talk, do something nice (and un-wedding related!) for your fiance.

3. Avoid making sudden decisions. Take a step back and sleep on wedding decisions so you don’t make any rash choices or hurt your friends and families in the process. And don’t forget to value input from the appropriate parties in matters that affect them.

You can get more advice on avoiding becoming a Bridezilla here.

So, if you have any Bridezilla tendencies, you don’t have to give in… And if you already have, like I apparently have, you can always turn the tides and be a civilized bride again!