So, we’re in the process of writing out our envelopes for our save the date cards, and I’m wondering — how many of you follow the intense etiquette rules for wedding invitation addresses?  Just browsing online, I’ve seen a myriad of rules and regulations, many of which I have NOT been following. Here are some examples of the things I’m seeing:

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Changing your name is clearly a very personal decision.

What's My Name?

I see plenty of good reasons to change my name, and plenty of good reasons to keep the one I was born with. More than anything, I just like my current name. It sounds good together, and in a small way it tells a little story (though I can’t reveal that here since we don’t dish our real names). Its a name that I’ve been attached to, or has been attached to me, for 36 years. Changing it now feels as strange to me as it would to suddenly be raven haired, 6-inches shorter or speaking a new language. An altered parallel-universe version of me. Bizzaro Snapdragon.

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I have several friends that are now planning weddings.  My husband is a groomsman for a wedding this July, and we are going to a wedding in September for a college friend.  I am a bridesmaid for one in October and the matron of honor for my best friend’s wedding next March.

Preparing for all these weddings has got me excited again about the wedding planning process.  It’s great to be able to share my experiences and give advice to my friends.

Too bad those are not my legs!

One of the ways I have been helping some of my friends is passing along books and magazines that I found useful (not only did this help them, it helped clear out most of the wedding clutter from my house!  It’s a win-win!).  I was still getting some of my wedding magazines long after my wedding date. After skimming through them, I passed them along to these engaged friends.

I also bought wedding magazine subscriptions for three of my friends when they told us they were engaged.  It takes so long for wedding magazines to get you onto their distribution cycle that you have to start early!  As we all know, wedding magazines cost an arm and a leg at typical retail outlets, so it’s a huge savings to buy the year subscription.  My friends were all very pleased and excited when they received their first magazine.

Kim Kardashian shops for Bridal Magazines

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Let’s face it, weddings can be expensive…. not only for the hosts but for guests as well.  Attending a wedding can require travel expenses, hotel accommodations, and then of course there’s a gift to be purchased.  And let’s not forget the bridal party!  Our best buds often end up shelling out money for special wedding attire and pre-wedding events in addition to the costs regular guests face; which can really add up.  Sure our bridesmaids and groomsmen are our closest friends and are happy to support us on our big day; but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t exercise good judgment and restraint when imposing costs on them.  My advice to you?  Remember to consider financial situations when choosing your bridal party and don’t ask them to pay for more than you’d be willing to if the situations were reversed.

Source

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I spend most evenings scouring the Internet looking at this site, bridal blogs, wedding websites, etc… and tonight I came across someone who said this…

The only things that should last forever is your marriage and your photography – everything else is just details.

I think I agree.  I am going to try to keep this in mind when I am stressing over flowers and invitations and favors.  I knew from the get go that the wedding photography was important to me.  It is one of the first things I booked.  I love our photographer and her work.  From the moment I stepped foot into her home for our first meeting…I knew I was going to hire her.  I know that the photos she takes of us we will have forever and they will be passed down to our children…so I had no qualms when it came to the cost of the wedding photography.  Seeing our wedding photos is one of the things I look forward to the most about our wedding.

Here are a few of my favorites from our photographer to be, Amy Sandoval.

http://www.amysandovalphotography.com/

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I live in NY and my wedding is in Newport RI.  So the two ways I usually communicate with wedding vendors are phone and email.  But I prefer email over phone for a few reasons.

Image from The Moxie Mash

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I got invited to a black tie, Catholic wedding that’s taking place in February in Washington, D.C. We met the lovely couple at Pre Cana (remember I talked about how much we enjoyed it before?) and became friends fast. They are actually getting married at our venue as well and were kind enough to invite us along.  Unfortunately, Gardenia dude will be in New Orleans that weekend for my future brother-in-law’s bachelor party, but I’m not going to miss it.  That being said, I need some advice about attire.  Do I wear a gown to the church part of the wedding that starts at 3pm? The reception does not start until 7pm so there is a lag where I could go home and change and for some reason, I feel a bit strange wearing an evening gown to a church at 3pm in the afternoon.

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Dogwood Dude and I have begun to interview photographers and have found some great ones in the Miami/Keys area through WeddingWire. We browsed many photos, read tons of reviews and have asked all the typical questions.  After going through my list, I asked the photographers if they could think of any question I forgot to ask or had any questions for Dogwood Dude and me. I never expected to get this one… Do you plan to see each other before the ceremony? I have always pictured myself walking down the aisle and seeing DD’s face when he saw me for the first time, but I couldn’t answer immediately for some reason.  There was this little voice in the back of my head that kept thinking how great it would be to have that moment to ourselves.

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As brides-to-be or newlyweds, I’m sure you’re aware that it is common to receive gifts for your engagement, bridal shower, and wedding. And we brides know that wherever gifts abound, thank you notes are sure to follow!

Source: www.esquire.com

According to Emily Post, wedding thank you notes should be sent within 3 months of receiving the gift. This was unfortunate news to me since I’ve always been a believer (and supporter!) of the common fallacy that couples have until their one year anniversary to both receive and send thank you notes for wedding gifts. Oooops!  Here are some other tips from our favorite etiquette mentor, Emily Post:

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They say you have a year to give a gift for a wedding, but that you should send Thank You’s within a month.  What about Thank you notes for your vendors?  Is prompt payment and a tip enough?  We don’t think so, but unfortunately we’ve left our vendors un-thanked for almost six months.  I was great about sending our guests thank you notes within 2-3 weeks of the wedding.  For gifts received later, I usually sent the thank you card out the day we got the gift in the mail.  We tracked all our gifts and when thank you notes were sent through the WeddingWire feature.  But because I was so focused on thanking those that gave us something, our vendors got the short end of the stick.  Then I was sending thank you notes for friends helping us move, for housewarming gifts, etc.  I kept putting the vendor thank you notes off.

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